Saturday, November 21, 2009

Crying Again?

"When was the last time you cry?"
I remembered asking students in my class.
Some of the girls smiled, "Last night.." One of them said.
"Last week.." another one said.

But the boys gave me an emotionless look.
"We don't cry, Madam..man don't cry..."
I imagine that those words were in their mind.
May be. I don't know, because none of them said anything.

There are many categories of tears, I agree to the opinion that there are three categories of tears.

The first one is physical tears. You fell down, your feet got twisted..ouch! That hurts!It is so painful, that tears came out from your eyes. That's physical tears. This is the kind of tears that mothers will remind their young sons, "Don't cry..you are a boy.."

The second one is emotional tears.
You are watching a Bollywood movie. The handsome hero died, so the girl was left alone, heart broken..and she ended up being forced to marry the man that she could never love because her true love has died. Tears welled up in your eyes, how sad that is..why does the movie has a sad ending?...You cried.

The third one is the kind of tears shed by prophets, faithful believers and righteous people. Tears of repentance are shed in the darkness of the night by faithful believers and righteous people while seeking for forgiveness from The Most Forgiving, Al-Ghaffar. Tears of love shed by prophets, how they yearned to return to The Most Loving, Ar-Rahmaan, Ar-Rahiim. The heavy burden of carrying the message of truth always make prophets cry in the privacy of their night prayers, begging for the divine help and guidance. These noble men found solace through their tears. This is called spiritual tears.

We shed physical tears when we are physically touched. It's quite natural that when we experience unbearable pain, tears would flow even from the eyes of the toughest man. I saw someone who's very close to me cried quietly after his coronary bypass surgery. He is the type of man who can endure pain, nothing is ever too painful to him, but a heart surgery is not a joke. I cannot imagine the pain that he went through after his ribcage is opened and clamped to the sides, the rib bones had to be cut, not to mention the surgery for the heart itself. On that day I understood why morphine is actually a useful drug, to help people in the most severe pain.

When we are emotionally touched, our tears flow out of happiness or sadness. People cry at funeral, wedding, graduation day or farewell party. If it is out of sadness, we feel the pain inside, we are not hurt physically but it is painful. Crying can be a form of relief from this pain. If it is out of happiness, we feel the joy inside, so much joy that it brought tears. But sometimes emotional tears can also come out over such a mundane thing that it can be considered as useless tears.

Spiritual tears is the most gratifying of all. A new Muslim revert often relate their experience of being moved to tears the moment they recognize the truth and found the light of Islam that they have been searching for years.
A pilgrim would cry upon seeing the Kaabah for the first time and performing a prayer in Raudhah in our beloved Prophet's (SAW) mosque can move even the hardest heart to tears.
It is a mixture of indescribable feelings but it is not out of pain. When we can feel our insignificant existence in this gigantic universe, we are spiritually touched and our tears flow out of realization that whatever we 'own' is nothing. There's no reason for us to walk on earth arrogantly.

Sometimes we mistakenly presume that tears is a symbol of weakness or femininity. Boys who had been trained by their parents not to cry tend to misunderstood the function of tears and felt ashamed to cry.
While it is true that women cry more than men, it is the category of tears that makes a difference, it is not a privilege for women. Tears is natural.

Our beloved Prophet Muhammad SAW was once reported to have said that,
'If you know what I know, you will cry more and laugh less'.
May Allah blessed us with tears, the kind that will save us from the fire of hell.

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